It’s been a long time cuming…
January 6th 2009
So here at The Clap, ohhhhhhhhh just so much has been going on… well not really. To tell you the truth I think we all just needed a little break from the late night hours, the many many Bacon Double Del Cheese Burger meals, the constant midnight youporn visits, the endless searches for crappy easy women on pathetic social networking sites… To tell you the truth I’m tired as @%ck right now, but I promissed myself and the other little girls that I work with on this BS that at least something would be posted tonight!
There’s a lot around the corner kids. We have a four section Podcast from our East Coast trip to the Outer Banks coming to you soon… maybe even this week, who knows? I know I can never tell for sure. We were taken care of by the sickest dude, Ricky Miller and his rugged man friends. They showed us some or their mystical poo colored surf, that although was at the time on the smaller side was a lot of fun… not to mention the infamous Sea Hag that You’ve all probably seen on our splash page (don’t worry, soon all will be told of that little adventure).
Also in the next Bodyboarder Magazine we got a super wet and sexual three page spread-em that will BLOW your little brains… sorry I lied… it’s actually going to be really homo-erotical, and hopefully I’m correct when I say “next issue,” and it’s not the next issue after that issue… You know what I am saying DOG?
In other news, My 8th month old (or something like that)… Stouche, as Mr. Miller and the North Carolina Boys liked to call it, has been put to rest. It was a sad, sad day, but you know what… I needed a break from that A-hole. I was so tired of the mouthfuls of hair when eating my B.D.D.C.B. meals.
Anyways, it’s about time for me to ride my baby blue Westfailure (as Mr. Sean English has called it on the super sick 805bbr-dot-com forum) to a neighbor hood near you. Where I will be sleeping, like a little moron baby, with my sick new Eddie Bauer sleeping sack that you wished you had, and my gnome covered pillow case that your dad wished he had, and my 12 inch rubber… uhhhhh something or otherrrrrrr yeahhhhh that your mom wished she had. Oh and speaking of in a neighborhood near you… If you ever so happen to see me in or around my little blue bus for the rest of January (awake please, I need my sick homeless dude sleep)… It’s the 81 VW beauty with the magenta and cyan THE CLAP stickers on the back and left rear windows, I’ll give you a free copy of our video, Soft Core. HOLY WOW isn’t that sick or what? But remember only for this month, so keep your little eyes open.
Good night kids, and get ready for the worst Clap infections yet. Please enjoy the fallowing THINGS.
